Joy

My friend Allyson recently shared this quote from C.S. Lewis - "God cannot give us happiness apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing."

This quote struck me because I often find myself wishing for happiness or attempting to stir the emotion within myself. I place myself on the beach, my favorite place on earth, and wait for happiness to descend on me. When it doesn't, I start to despair. I even pray to God for additional things that I believe will make me happy. I tell him what I don't like about my situation. When I am unhappy, God and I are in constant conversation.

And then, I read this verse: "Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." - 1 Thess. 5:16-18

Bam. Conviction. Even though, in the midst of the unhappiness, I feel like I am praying without ceasing, I am not rejoicing. And, of all the many prayers I pray, I do not pray for joy. I expect happiness to rain down upon me, and then I will run off and be free of this constant dependence on God. What a fool I am! This is God the Father that I approach with all my complaints. He reigns over every person, every family, and every situation. This is the God who promises "strength through His Spirit in your inner being" (Eph 3:16) and the God who allows us to "know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God" (Eph 3:19). This is the God who is "able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think" (Eph. 3:20). And still, I do not pray for the one thing I desperately need, one of the things God explicitly wills for me, the one thing that would allow me to be a light to those around me - that is, joy.

This morning, I ask for it, above all my other wishes. I do not seek happiness apart from the Father. I never want to be free of my need for Him or free of the trials that throw me into His arms.

I do have much to be thankful for and many blessings in my life, but even if all of these were stripped away, I could still have joy. I would have the Lord.

"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me." Psalm 23:4